fun for all the family

apart from an attack of the dreaded lergy, I’m fine. I’ve kind of got my voice back. life is sweet. and not sounding so much like I’ve been YELLING ALOT & drinking WAY too much whiskey and rum… which by the way, is pretty accurate. but what is a girl to do with a sore throat otherwise. suck throaties?

I saw a lot of music over the weekend. that’s good; even though all the music wasn’t. I like the crowd as much as the bands. sometimes. I loved Calvin Johnson singing about rabbits and turtles. I didn’t love it so much the night before when he talked for half an hour. BLAHBLAHBLAH. he has an amazing voice so I watched anyways... in between taking photos of all those indie kids cute shoes. I was pleased, more than before, about ALWAYS and pleased again by FABULOUS DIAMONDS.


then sometimes you just have to leave half way through. which is what I did yesterday afternoon with deerhoof.

so you’re clever… I LIKE CLEVER, you’re having fun with it? GREAT. I’m pleased for you, especially YOU mongy drummerman… but sometimes simpler is better, like a bit of soul, a bit of SATISFACTION... a bit of heart. maybe...

maybe it’s just a little over my head.

dear readers, that wouldn’t be hard. par exemple.

on the way home I was introduced to another driving game. and cause I’m a sharer, here’s some LOWLY ways for YOU* to pass the time.


simply place the word ‘anal’ in front of any cars name. then marvel at the wonder of this crazy sci-fi fantasy porn world.

anal explorer, anal impala, anal laser, anal transporter, anal grandeur, anal star, anal starrion…

I came up with the cock variation, inspired by COCK *TM.

the original "fun for all the family!" game.
simply substitute cock into any movie/book title, and be pleased with yourself, YOU JUVENILE...

hours** of fun.

the return of the cock… buffalo cock, cock in the garden of good and evil, cock on a hot tin roof, OW, cock in the afternoon, cock mountain, ferris beullers cock off.
it gets truly annoying after awhile though, you find yourself with a headache trying to think of newer better titles. A real waste of brains... but your reading drivel on the internet, so you can talk...

** after about half an hour you’ll want to kill anyone who says cock, and you’ll want your money back, but you didn’t pay DID YOU??? and you'll be asking to have your brain cleaned somewhere? but NOPE. sorry.

you may also develop eye strain from trying to read the badges of passing cars.

so you don’t have to go through that, here’s some good cars for cock… that I found earlier.

cock lancer, cock ranger, cock forrester and my personal favourite... COCKCOROLLA. a bit like lola rock n roller crossed with engrish for coke.

hey look! ooo ooo monkeys! it's COCK BANANA! in syrup!


want more driving games? kate and I are won’t to practice insults whilst driving, limited by the letters on the number plates of passing cars… simon bore witness to this one day, when without warning we both started muttering random abusive terms whilst driving. he thought we were overcome by tourettes in tandem.

once initiated he was pretty good at it… being all wordy and stuff. though even for him some letters are more challenging… X anyone? but Rachael had quite a bit of flair with making them up schoolyard style & bringing out some long forgotten classics.

which get's me misty-eyed... thinking back to one summer day, driving a ute around the suburbs leaving stuff with numerous unsuspecting friends before I left town, entertaining ourselves with a very rewarding game of 'HUNGRY BUM' & 'GUNT' spotting. in some suburbs we had a field day. there are some real hot spots out there. next time you find yourself LOST at northcote plaza don’t blame me if you’re bored.

No comments: